Scripts for Starting Out

Okay, it’s finally happening. All the resources say that it is important to stay very positive through the potty training process. Yet almost every personal parent account I found started with the parent admitting they were dreading the process. So, we’ve got very specific scripts to help you fake it.



  • “Tell me when you need to go potty.”
  • “Let’s go to the potty!”
  • “Is your underwear dry?”
  • “I’m so proud of you for learning to be a big kid and use the potty today”
  • “You’re doing a great job of keeping your undies dry today.”
  • “Before we go (outside, to the store, take a nap, etc.) we use the potty.”
  • “You don’t have to go, but you have to try.”
  • If using rewards, point to the sticker chart or reward jar and ask, “How can you get one of those?”


  • “Would you like to use the potty now?”
  • “Do you need to use the potty?”

The child will almost always say no. No one WANTS to use the potty. But “tell me when you need to use the potty” puts the responsibility on the child, and lets both parent and child know they are capable. Don’t be vague. Instead of “you need to tell me sooner,” press gently on the lower abdomen of the child and say, “When you feel that funny pressure right here, that means you need to use the potty. Tell a grown-up and they can get you to the potty right away.

Accident Scripts

We recommend wrapping your head around this now: accidents will happen, and they will never happen at a good time. You may want to yell and stomp your feet when there is a mishap, but this is where you are going to need incredible self-control and some good scripts to lean on. After all, your job is to remain upbeat, positive, encouraging, and committed to seeing the process through with your child.

Oh, and a note about accidents - most experts don't consider a child to have an accident when you are actively potty training because wet or soiled undies is part of the learning process. We usually consider a child to have accidents after they have been fully trained for a few weeks to months and beyond.


Zen as a Hindu Cow

  • “Oh, too bad. I know you wanted to use the potty. It is uncomfortable to be all wet.”
  • “Pee/Poo goes in the potty, not on the floor. We need to clean this up.”
  • “That wasn’t a good choice.”
  • “Let’s put the pee in the potty next time.”
  • Can you find one thing to praise? Maybe they didn’t make it in time, but they wiped well, or washed their hands correctly. Let the child know you noticed.


  • “That was naughty.”
  • “I told you to tell me when you need to go.”
  • “Why did you pee on the floor?”

Don’t show anger or frustration. INNER PEACE!

Success Scripts

What’s the right amount of praise when a child DOES successfully use the potty? They haven’t saved the planet, but hey, baby steps.


Say This.

  • “I KNEW you could do it”
  • Tell another person (maybe a sibling, grandparent, or alternate caretaker about the success while the child overhears.
  • “Right on! You put the pee in the potty, right where it belongs!.”
  • “You used the potty, let’s do a happy dance!”



Keep it in perspective, my friend.

Scripts for weening from rewards

If you chose to use a sticker chart or small candies to get your child using the potty, you may be worried about removing that piece of your happy, diaper-free life. We got you.


Gold Star

  • Give the agreed reward for at least 2 weeks
  • Wean rewards gradually. Maybe once pee is mastered, you tell them they get a reward when they POOP in the potty.
  • Continue to praise them for the excellent big kid behavior, but stop reminding them of the reward. Provide it only if they remember to ask. Do not continue to provide the treat in this way for more than a month. Explain that she is a big girl now and you’re so excited for her to have this new level of independence and that now you know she can do even MORE big girl things.

Keep your pants on.

The full article is coming soon.

Story Time:

Additional Resources: